


Calm Emotions

by Pawthorn



Series: Febuwhump 2021 [1]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Campaign 2 (Critical Role), FebuWhump2021, Gen, Hurt Caduceus Clay, Hurt Caleb Widogast, Mind Control, POV Caleb Widogast, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-01
Updated: 2021-02-01
Packaged: 2021-03-12 18:53:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29140329
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pawthorn/pseuds/Pawthorn
Summary: Immediately in the aftermath of episode 123, Caleb processes, and watches Caduceus do what he does whenever his control starts to slip.
Relationships: Caduceus Clay & Caleb Widogast
Series: Febuwhump 2021 [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2138700
Comments: 16
Kudos: 93





	Calm Emotions

Caleb's stomach churned as he curled himself into Yasha's steady, strong arms. He knew her wings wouldn't last much longer. Soon, they would need to land and rearrange and take stock and plan. But for now, he let himself drift, pressing his hands to the gashes across his chest, trying to do what he could for his injuries.

But at least those marks were only skin deep.

It would take longer to shake the pain and fear of those long, cold moments on the ground, powerless, with enemies surrounding them in the dark. He relied on magic so often to pull him and his friends through. And he had  _ earned _ those abilities, through work and study and sacrifice. To have them stripped away, to be laid bare and helpless in the face of murderers… Caleb knew he would be thinking of this night for a long time.

And he wasn't the only one.

Glancing over through the snow, he could see Owl-Jester, cradling Caduceus in her talons. Caduceus, whose magic was woven into a faith that spanned centuries. Caduceus, who tried to reason, to surrender. Who had been violently attacked even so.

The lanky cleric looked small, curled in on himself. His face was married by streaks that looked black in the darkness, but Caleb could still see their crimson brightness in his mind's eye. Could still remember Caduceus stumbling away from Lucien, grabbing Caleb, trying to pull them both to safety. Could still recall relief warring with dread as Yasha pulled him from Caduceus' side and back to safety. Seeing his friend, alone and helpless as he faced their enemies.

It seemed like Caduceus was still there as well, in his mind at least. He stared into the darkness ahead, features lax. A single, wet streak from his eye carved a path through the mess of blood on his face. He looked broken. Caleb understood the feeling all too well.

Slowly, he turned and met Caleb's eyes, probably sensing the other man's gaze. Caleb gave a small wave and what he hoped to be an encouraging smile.

Caduceus jolted, looking away and wiping his face quickly. Then, so subtly that Caleb would have missed it had he not been watching closely, the cleric pressed a hand to his own chest and cast a spell.

The haunted expression slid from Caduceus' face like melting snow. His posture relaxed. He turned back to Caleb with a reassuring nod and an easy smile.

Caleb felt his stomach swoop, and not just because Yasha was landing.

By the time they rearranged the group so that most of them were riding the mammoth, Caduceus was leading the discussion of what to do next. Calm and collected. As if he hadn't been stripped of his magic and attacked less than five minutes ago. No one else seemed to find it strange.

It's what they expected of him.

But Caleb held onto the memory of his face. How he had looked when he thought no one was watching. Caleb resolved not to let it go. To find a way to tell Caduceus that it was alright to be afraid. To be hurt. To not shake it off right away.

But there would be time for that later.

Now, they had to move.

**Author's Note:**

> Caduceus using Calm Emotions to keep himself in check MIGHT be an unhealthy pattern. Just saying.


End file.
